Tonight, I will be telling you a story. There was this guy I've met 4 years ago. He's tall. Thin, and of course, I was stunned with his angel like face. I actually daydreamed about him since the day I met him. But sadly, I didn't get a chance to talk to him, not even once. I don't why. Whenever I see him walking along the hallway, I am left speechless. I am like a fan who couldn't talk to her idol. I know, he never knew of these things I do for him because he never noticed me then. I actually wanted to talk to him, but I don't know what to say. Then I was shocked when he added me on facebook last Aug of 2010. Why? Then I knew he's my classmates cousin.
After a year of leaving school, he was out of my mind. I came back to school to finish my studies. And of course, there's Intramurals, and after one year, I saw him again. He was playing volleyball. I cheered for him. He is still that guy I saw 4 years ago. Tall, thin and owns the angelic face that never gets old. Who would knew it? I felt that same old feeling. But still, I am left speechless.
I am fascinated with those youtube starts who gained their popularity by singing in front of the camera and upload it on youtube. So I decided to do their stuff. But it's not about gaining popularity. I recorded a song, edited it, and out of nowhere, uploaded it on facebook. I tagged friends who are close to me just to let them know that I am fond with this stuff. But then, I never knew that I accidentally tagged him. YES! HIM. He posted a comment that make me feel those butterflies on my stomach. He even made a request and urgently, I grant it. AT LAST! I may get a chance to talk to him. Then, he left me a message saying, "Ang galing mo naman kumanta." And those endless talks on facebook continued. Until we get to text each other, calls, every night, every day. As time passed by, he started to show some care, worry, and concern. He laughs at my jokes, I laugh at his jokes too. I have given so much time on him. Since then, I asked myself, What is this?
It became clear to me when he, himself, directly told me that I am just a friend to him. Yes it hurts. It feels like everything we had was scattered into pieces, so as my heart. I'm broken. I cried a lot. I even randomly whip my hair back and forth while I am alone in my room. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to think. He fills my mind. After that night, we met. We had personal talks. We became so much closer. Knowing that someone is sorry for breaking your heart is such a relief. He's sorry. Maybe, he overused the word SORRY that night.
There are many situations that tested our friendship. Even an argument. That was when I felt the fear of loosing someone. I really did everything I had to do just to make him stay. My feelings grew more every single day. Even though I knew that we are just friends, I'm still in love with him. Everyday, I tell myself not to expect too much, not to fall too deep, because we are just friends. And every time I tell those words, I get hurt, I cry. But after all these pains, heartaches, and fear. We're still good friends. And both of us are just wondering what God has planned for us? If you could imagine all our experiences together, you might think that this relationship will end up nothing. That maybe, the both of us might be just STRANGERS AGAIN. But no. A big NO! God didn't allowed it. And I know He has better plans.
As for now, I am praying for God's answer. And everyday, my devotion points out the thought of WAITING. Maybe God wants me to wait a little longer. To PATIENTLY WAIT. But I have prepared myself to whatever answer that God would give me. If it YES, I'd be so much thankful. If it is NO, I know God has better plans.
But if God created him for someone else, here are some trivia about him
- If you're texting him at night, don't be mad at him when he don't stay up late. He's the kind of person who can randomly sleep anytime.
- Don't meet him at McDo Sta. Cruz, Ministop may do. You can enjoy walking with him at the Capital after eating. :)
- Have a bunch of stories stored on your mind. Tell him a story every time. He's a good listener.
- Love music. Especially slow music. He love to share music, sing your favorite song, and listens to you while you sing.
- If you want to win his stomach, cook ampalaya.
- Don't let him eat too much salty food. He had UTI. okay?
- When he's sad or upset, don't give him advice, JUST LISTEN TO HIM.
- If you're going out with him at such a sudden time, don't mind him wearing FIONA sleepers. He's cute when he wears it.
- Cheer him up everyday! He gets a little emotional on simple things.
- Don't cry in front of him. He might get mad at you, you'll cry even more. LOL. Just don't cry, he don't like that. Just be happy. ALWAYS
- If the relationship you have with him hurts you, don't let him go. Knowing someone will leave him makes him sad.
- Love GOD. He loves GOD too. :) Let God be the center of your relationship.
These are not terms and conditions. Just keep these words in mind. You might be the person that can win his heart so, just so you know, I posted this blogpost to let you know that he is such a great person. I can't think of myself falling in love with any other guys. Even those guys that is better that him. But I know time will come, this feelings may fade if we are not meant to be.
But now, all I can say is, "I won't give up."
because I believe in the power of PRAYER. <3
GOD BLESS! <3
*Why BUKO? Because I am listening to Jireh Lim's BUKO while typing this. :)
BUKO! BUhay KO! <3